Mr Bagel

Wednesday, 17 January 2007

Though I walk through the valley of Self Haters and Tin Foil hat wearers I fear no evil.

UOJ
I watched as one brave individual, UOJ took on what was seriously wrong with the Orthodox world.

Aspersions were cast upon his motives and character.

Quite virulent threats were made.

I did nothing.
____________

Hate not Love

I watched as parts of the Jewish blog world attacked and made outrageous claims about Gays and Lesbians, and their right to having a parade in Jerusalem.

Messages of intolerance and hatred were preached, Groups threatened bombings, murder, rewards for crimes of hate.

I did nothing.
____________

Dovbear gets mauled

I watched as a formerly respected blogger called Dovbear was cast into a fiery pit for not attributing parts of his post to sources, 11 times if I am not mistaken. For a prolific poster like DovBear partly understandable.

Mistakes most of us have in some way have made, sometime when blogging.

'Crimes against humanity were commited',
Taken to task by the blogger Dovweasel

Dovweasel who lacks the courage to identify themselve(s) within the Jewish community.

Casting aspersions upon people whilst not revealing that they obviously used plagiarism software to scan his blog. To Claim they managed to find the vast majority of his 'sins' in 2 hours manually is simply a blatant lie.

I did nothing.
____________

JBlog Central Departing; all aboard

I watch as Jbloggers seized on another target, the Israel Forum, they criticized, complained, kvetched and screamed boycott.

Even though criticisms had been responded to, and many Improvements were/are being made. Israel Forum's motive is questioned. A seeming lack of advertising becomes a reason for a paranoid conspiracy threat. They must be up to something no good. No one does anything for nothing now a days.

I did nothing.
____________

Why, because I didn't want to rock the boat, because I wanted to maintain a chance at winning a blog award.

I've sold out.

Everything tells me that UOJ did the right thing.

Every thing screams that the vile attack on Gays and Lesbians was wrong.

Everything tells me the attack on DovBear was unwarranted in its degree of vengeance.

Everything tells me that despite a few hiccups, David at Israel Forums is trying to make the process run smoother.

Instead of a huge thanks he gets aspersions cast upon his intentions.

Enough!

Many of the Critics are my friends.

In fact one of the leaders of the boycott I greatly respect.

In Fact come to think of it DovWeasel's writing seems so familiar?

How do I reconcile what is going outside with what is going on inside?

Do Nothing?
__________

Or Stand up?

I'm standing up.

Bagelblogger

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I'm gonna get meself a Doktorate digree

I've just received the most amazing news. A friendly fellow has just emailed me and assured me that I can do the University degree I've always wanted. To be frank I wish this chap had emailed me earlier, it would have saved me a whole lot of time!

Any way Guaranteed acceptance! I sure do feel lucky. You know with not much work, and a few exchanges of mm fees, I'll have a PhD in no time.

Hey maybe I'll even get to have his job one day, and work on my spelling in my spare time...

____________________

Greetings Bagelblogger.
Honeslty are no demnaded tests, classes, books, or interviews !

Be given a_Bcahelors, Masters., MBA, and Doctorate (PhD) diploma.

Hvae the rewards and honor_that comes with a.dipolma !

Nveer anyone is not approved

Confidentilaity made

Start Tonight +1 (270) 818-7244
7 days a week
________________

Waiting for that return paid envelope any day now!

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Monday, 15 January 2007

Taking the 5th: Stolen Cars, Broken Hearts, and a Super Dooper Dumbo

Taking the Fifth: Imagine being in a strange place it's now night fall, you know no one, and you're looking at the vacant space where your car was.

Those that know Bagel well will know that my daughter Amber has just recently had some serious Heart Surgery.

Last weekend We had to take a long trip back to Sydney for a post operative 4 week check up.

Imagine parking your car on the Arid Street Parking Level 5 as you go shopping in one of those Super Large Shopping centres.

This shopping centre is so large it drawfs the Town we actually go to do our shopping in, when we're back in the bush [outback].

It's so big that I wonder if there is anyone that has ever seen every shop and level. It looks like some spiffy hotel, there's leather lounges every where, the doormen are in uniforms , they smile at you and open doors, the decor looks like one of Sadam's palaces before some visitors ruined the party.

Well we don't get to shopping centres very often, in fact if you're after more than a Litre of Milk or a bolt for your tractor then the town we normally shop at isn't what you would call the hottest shopping district.

Mum, Dad and the three little angels were of on an adventure of Dorothy proportions. We were on the Yellow brick road of consumer adventure with our pockets stuffed with cash. Now those pockets may have been stuffed with low denomination bills but hey, they were still stuffed.

Our eldest had been carefully squirreling money away for that day when we get to go to the ' big shop'. We hadn't quite realized just how well she had been squirreling money away until she boasted she had $x number of dollars and Dad told her not to tell tattle tales, she said she wasn't and was adamant.

Being only 6 (almost 7 Dad!) she is a very resourceful saver. Admittedly there's not much to buy where we live except tractor bolts but she had raised quite a sum.

Before we had realized the sum she had, Dad had shot of his mouth and told her She was getting a big surprise sum of money because she had such a good school report.

The first shock was that she decided that most of the 'big' money was going to be used to buy her little sister Amber the biggest 'Dumbo' elephant you can get. Jade knows Amber loves Elephants and Jade knew Amber had just had some serious open heart surgery.

I must admit, I am quite hard on Jade, she is very smart and because of that I fear she may try to take advantage of her peers who aren't as gifted, I'm always talking about thinking of 'others', but as a 6 year old she sometimes looks a little glazed over during Dad's talks.

I was taken aback by Jades offer, yet cautiously waited to see if this rather generous offer was followed through.

Back to the Shopping centre, Mum, Dad the three girls, two shopping trolleys and 8 out of 10 hands busy carrying or pushing goodies which we normally go with out.

We went up the escalator to the 3rd level then to the 4th and finally to the 5th level. Mum and Dad struggling with the Days shopping, the trolleys full of exotic fruits, groceries, toys, clothes things you just can't get where we live, Jade struggling with the biggest Dumbo you could lay your eyes on.

We turned the corner on the 5th level and went out through the Automatic carpark door around the corner and there, right there is where our car used to be....

Two adults struggling with their trolleys, the eldest two out of the three girls with their arms full and all we could do was look at the spot where our car used to be.

400km from home, overloaded with now not so important goodies and my heart sunk to the car park floor.

In the darkness of what would have been our car parking spot existed an even darker empty hole, there was no car, no trunk, no welcoming but worn seats, no cd player no ignition,wheels, engine steering wheel nothing; just a horrid empty space.

The only thing that was left was the tell tale patch of transmision fluid from where we had overfilled the power steering pump just before the trip

Life can be cruel, when you least expect it. Our little girl 4 weeks out of heart surgery, we had finally saved money to go on a modest shopping spree and now the cruelest of blows.

My partner looked up at me, and I could see the tears well in her eyes. This was it. Forget the presents, the surprises, they all surmounted to nothing, The cold harsh reality of getting home the next day to our remote country house was now a serious issue?

What to do? We trudged back like defeated footballers, we had been full of hope, dreams and every thing had just been shattered.

We walked back into the shopping centre as the automatic door whirled open the starkness of the bright lights hit us. I looked at the sign hoping it didn't say in dark green lettering

Unfortunately there it was in the same dark green lettering Arid Street Parking Upper Level 5, I glanced to the side of the entrance to see the poultry and small goods provider but it wasn't there...

'There' was the wrong shop.

But if it is the wrong shop couldn't it be we were on the wrong level?

No it was definitely the Arid Street Parking Level 5 ,(front right corner ) we had parked the car. Why the parking spot had that same dirty large grease spot from another car and it even had our leaking power steering fluid there.

It was like being caught in a virtual world, a virtual shopping center that seemed to be made of liquid it ebbed and flowed and things changed at a whim, a terrible cross between de ja vour and a lucid dream.

The same escalator. The same Doorways. The same lights. The same floor. The same dark green sign that said Arid Street Parking Upper Level 5.

Hey I don't remember that Upper part?

Could it be? Or is it a further cruel joke that reality is playing, surely they wouldn't paint two levels exactly the same with dark green color coded poles and walls and barriers, and name those two levels the same in Dark green signwriting with the only difference being the word Upper ?

They did.

And Ambers Dumbo wasn't the only Dumbo in the car home that night.

We drove home thinking our old bomb wasn't such a bad car after all.

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Friday, 12 January 2007

Bodgey Bagel's Caption Contest week 12

Week 12 Of Bodgey Bagel's Incredible Caption Contest!
For Entry into Bodgey Bagel's Caption Contest Week 12
Leave your Caption for the Photo in the comments.

All entries must be in before Wednesday 17th January

...ahh the heat was unbearable!
Caption away! Leave your entries in the comments section
before Wednesday 17th January.

May the best caption win!

The Winner of Last weeks Contest No 11: (10th Jan)

[Click Read More..]

The Tenth 'almost famous' Bodgey Bagel Weekly Photo Caption contest winner.

The 11th Bodgey Bagel Caption Contest winner is.....Drum Roll

1st Place: Convinced that nobody would look for him there, Osama starts hanging with K'fed. [ Adjustah ]
2rd Place:Frank Swartz was frustrated, he couldn't be the look-alike for Frank Sinatra or Sean Connery, noooo, he was cursed with this look. [ elliot ]
=3rd Place: Osama relaxes before his next cab driving shift. [ chsw10605 ]
=3rd: They forgot my 'Happy Meal'.[ elliot ]
4th Place: "McAllahu McAkbar!" [ Rodney Dill ]
5th Place: "Yes I got the McMohammed Meal" [ Rodney Dill ]
Honorable Mentions:
HM: Osama bin Laden enjoys a McMeal in a Parisian Cafe. [Thomas Forsyth ]

HM:, Four #2 value meals: #13.99, New Polo shirt: $15.00, New slacks: $65.00.
Expression on Osama's face when he found a finger in his food: Priceless. [ elliot ]
HM: Michael Moore caught Osama on film in his movie 'Super Size That' and didn't know it. It was edited out. [ elliot ]
Bagel's Dishonourable Mention: The Real Ronald McDonald contemplates his next terrorist attack with Hamburglar[BB]

Thanks for you entries! Bagelblogger

Other blogs with Caption Contests:
Outside the Beltway
Rightpundits.com
Willisms
Commonwealth Conservative
Bullwinkle Blog
The Right Place
Bravozulu
The Gone Rick Motel
Blogmeister USA
Cowboy Blob
SgtStryker
Wizbang Blog

If you want to add your caption contest just ask..

With Thanks to all those that entered - Bagelblogger.
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Tuesday, 9 January 2007

Peacetrain to nowhere... Your Childhood hero reveals himself to be a farce

The Paradox
I've been a fan of Cat Stevens all my life. I remember sneaking out of my bedroom into the hall to listen to the grown-ups who were; listening to Cat Stevens.

I have his cd's in my car cd stacker.

Despite my intentions of converting to Orthodox Judaism, I have had some issues and a lot of indecision with regards to one of the very few singers I listen to regularly.

Cat Stevens becomes Yusuf Islam

So he converted to Islam, his brother brought a Koran from Israel of all places, brought it back to England, gave it to Cat and Islam became his way of life.

I tell myself, well everything I listen to was recorded clearly before he became a Muslim, so what ever he does with his private life now doesn't really matter.

A New Album
He's got a new album out, Another cup Yusuf

I was in a dilemma how can I buy it, should I buy it? Should I simply acknowledge he is of Islamic faith and that in no way means I can't appreciate his 'gift'.

Yes I think so...

That was until I read this report.

'NYT' Sunday Preview: Trying to Get Cat Stevens To Back or Bash Hamas

NEW YORK Most of Deborah Solomon's interview with once and current folk-rock singer Cat Stevens -- known for many years now as Yusuf Islam -- for this coming Sunday's New York Times is amiable enough, as he discusses his recent return to recording and his funding of Muslim schools in England.

But then she raises the obviously still touchy issue of attempts abroad to link him to funding various extremist groups, including Hamas. He had just said he still sells about 1.5 million albums a year netting him a small fortune. What does he think of Hamas?

"That's an extremely loaded question," he replies. Pressed further, he says, "I have never supported a terrorist group or any group that did other than charity and good to humankind."
Solomon responds by saying, fine, but many Americans would like moderate Muslims, such as himself, to denounce the extremists. Wouldn't he at least say he has "contempt" for Hamas?
"I wouldn't put those words in my mouth," he complains. "I wouldn't say anything on that issue. I'm here to talk about peace. I'm a man who does want peace for this world," says the man who wrote "Peace Train," adding, "and I don't think you will achieve that by putting people into corners and asking them very, very difficult questions about very contentious issues."

Crap! Your either against an organisation that advocates the death of Israelis and the destruction of Israel or you're for them. There's no contentious issue! Its not a loaded question. The only contentious issue here is the continual observation that so called 'Moderate Muslims' not taking a Radical Muslim group to task.

Wrong is wrong.

During the Israeli - Hezbollah war in Australia, there were huge 'Peace Marches' [read anti-Israel rallies], attended by thousands of Lebanese Muslims protesting against the War.

Yet do I remember:
Muslim Peace Marches when thousands collapsed to their death in the World trade centers?
NO
When 202 people, including 88 Australians were murdered horribly, whilst simply having fun in Bali
NO
When 191 where murdered in the Madrid Train bombs?
NO
When 52 people were killed and 700 injured on the London train and bus bombings?
NO

Yusuf you profess to want peace but:

Mr Religion of Peace your position is a farce and your religion, because of the lack of courage by its 'moderate' participants to confront evil is becoming a farce!

Why does it seem Muslims are only vocal when it suits their direct agenda?

For the whole of my life I've listened to your music and not heard your lies.

The journey is Over

Tonight it stops! I'm getting off, this Peace Train it is going nowhere.

You're inaction is a disgrace to the Peace movement and every thing you sung about Yusuf Islam.

A Failure to Act

Your failure to use your position of Standing within the Islam community betrays the fear you have of criticizing those very Radical elements.

Btw cutesy new website Yusuf, An Other Cup official web site

You paint quite the glossy picture of yourself.

But your refusal to criticize Radicals and Extremists within Islam speaks volumes on both you and Islam itself..

I'm sad. I could accept my favorite singer Cat Stevens becoming Yusuf Islam.

I even like your new album.

But I can't accept you being a farce.

You stood for so much that was important to me.I respected you for having the conviction to follow your choices, but your position now is intolerable for me.

Good bye Yusuf, I only have a distant memory of Cat now.

The second cut was deeper.

References:
SAWF.news: Former Cat Stevens returns to pop music world
Editor and Publisher: Trying to Get Cat Stevens To Back or Bash Hamas
Scotsman.com: Letting the Cat back out
Yusuf Islam: Peace Train [You Tube video]
cbc.ca: Web Exclusive interview: Yusuf Islam

Lyricsfreak: All Cat Stevens songs and Lyrics

Hat tip: Charles from LGF
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When your world turns upside down

Thinking outside the cube.

I've had it! We've put up with it all our life.

Us Aussies, aren't going to take it any more.

We are so sick of people refering to us as ' You guys from down under '!

From now on, it's you guys from the top!

Have you ever looked at something and wondered why?

Well I'm looking at planet earth and I'm wondering why?

Why is the Northern hemisphere on the top and the southern hemisphere on the bottom?

Now don't give me rubbish about North is on top and thats they way it is, it's always been that way.

Well who made that decision? And when was it made? Did they know the earth was round? I bet not!

Do you think that little bit of extraneous information might just have made them think, mmm, hang on a moment, if the worlds round then...

If you were to travel outside the 'milky way' and peered back in this is where our solar system would be.[Hypothetically]

Now I don't know about you but I'm having a hard time seeing the sun let alone the planet earth being Northern hemisphere up.

Now the only place where the earth might have a 'upside down' is in space. Of course Paradoxically any where that the Northern Hemisphere appears on top, you could mount a pretty good arguement you're looking at the earth upside down.

This might come to some of you as rather ground breaking news but when we Aussies let go of things they fall back to earth, they dont fall 'away from earth'. Thus again, I insist Australia is Not on the bottom.

Lets look at other reasons why Australia shouldn't be on the bottom.

Cricket.

You know that fine game the English play, seems their cricket team is currently busy proving why England is on the bottom of the world.

Swimnming.

Seems someone forgot to tell Aussies we're on the bottom!

Soccer, World Cup.

Australia gets beaten in the last 9 seconds of a game by the eventual world cup winners. Thats not the bottom to me!

It seems to me, if you go through countries sporting prowess, on a per capita basis it's pretty hard to fault the Aussies at most things sport wise. Which is really suprising considering Australia is supposed to be on the bottom of the world? Oh yeah base ball...

Baseball and the World Series.

Er, I dont mean to burst your bubbles, but can it really be a World series if its played between US teams?

That's right up there with the World Challenge Curling match between Norway and Saudi Arabia.

The History of depicting Australia on the bottom.

Well, it seems that since the discovery of the East coast of Australia, way back when England mattered as a World power, the draughtsman on the Endeavour that discovered the East coast of Australia wasn't drawing Australia as being on the bottom of the world.

I've come across that map drawn centurys before and it clearly shows Australia in its more correct position.

You will note the map is drawn from the correct position of on
Top
of the South Pole

This map as drawn during the voyage of The Endeavour Captained by James Cook.

Yes, that's Australia (circled in red) people and It's on top.

Now I don't want to crush people's world view all at once but you better get used to it.
From now on this is how a Map of the Earth looks. You will notice the Sothern hemisphere takes its rightful place. Eurocentric world views are a thing of the past, and Americans will now realise that Australia isn't a Suburb of L.A.

As you can clearly see in this more correct projection of the world,
Australia takes it's rightful place amongst the other Nations.
To see a larger version click on the map