With the JIB Awards about to begin their final round of voting, I thought it might be a good idea to reflect in a positive way about what it all really means.
Some of us are going to be madly running as fast as we can towards the finish line, ringing up neighbours, friends, emailing people we have neglected in a sudden display of ummhh 'sincerity', all to hasten our arrival to the finish line.
Some of us are so focused on the tape at the end of the race, that I wonder have we actually considered what is at the finishing line?
Could it be that Just like Willie Coyote we're busy inventing new ways to go faster and get more votes only to realise that once you have passed the finishing line their may actually be nothing there?
As in this metaphor that I've 'appropriated' from Warner Brothers', its not always the first to get somewhere that wins.
These are my first JIB's and in the spirit of positiveness and candidness I've done some things I'm not so proud of.
I've neglected my friends, I've neglected my family, I've been so busy 'with the awards' I haven't visited the people I know will still be there when this is all over.
In a moment of clarity and self realisation, I'd like to pause and share something with you.
Being involved initially in helping with these awards, was for me something I was very proud of.
I really did have only noble intentions, in fact I would have been quite happy not to run.
But whilst I was busy helping with these awards initially, something happened.
I changed from being an 'us' to a 'one' of them. I don't know why, I hadn't changed in any great way, but I felt a disconnect from the JBlogging community as a whole, I've never felt before.
Needless to say, after spending so much time working on a certain project and to think i had finished it, only to have it fail, I felt disappointed, and some what bitter.
That's the down side to my experience in helping with these awards.
I may sound like a broken record but I would like to make two observations:
1. Any one that helps run the JIB's in general is worthy of our respect.
2. Any one that helps with these awards, needs professional help.
Whoa? Yes, I ask you look at the track history of the Jewish Blogging Awards.
Its path is strewn with more dismembered bodies (people who wanted to make a difference) than the total number of awards given out.
These awards haven't all been bad for me thou.
I've got to meet some blogger who I would not have normally had the chance nor inclination to talk with. Some of them I argued seemingly about every single point, but given the chance to meet with them in real life now I would jump at the chance.
I've focused on making changes on my blog which all though requiring more work will ultimately make both my blog more enjoyable to read, and blogging more enjoyable to pursue.
I've formed an incredibly good friendship with a blogger. One of those very rare friendships you know will last as long as you do.
I've had people who normally wouldn't come to my blog actually come to check it out.
Whether they come with friendship in mind doesn't really matter, they came and that in itself gives the chance of friendship.
If I could change anything about myself and the JIB's what would it be?
I must admit I have in some ways I admired Cosmic X's position, he has refused point blank to seek the 'prestige' of these awards. Something which I know is in the Torah, and I think for good reason.
When we allow ourselves to be overtaken by our own sense of importance, or our own sense of what seems important to us at the time, we neglect the really 'important' things in life.
The partner who you have stopped talking to because you're so 'busy now', your children who you keep sending away telling them to find something to do, when all they want is what they had previously and seem to have in some way have lost - your love.
You know, as I sit here and type, I no longer 'imagine' winning a an award, I simply sigh, wish they would finish, and hope in some way I can make it up to the people I do love and have let down.
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Thursday, 10 May 2007