A New Edition of Monopoly:
Paris Hilton the Limited Edition
The manufacturers of Monopoly are proud to release its newest version of the world's most popular game.
It will be referred to as the Paris Hilton limited edition, (although rumor has it, it isn't quite such a limited edition.)
It features quite a few new additions, as well as some of the more traditional ones.
Some of the changes are:
Jail:
This square is to be rededicated and redeveloped into an shopping center offering facilities such as a jewelry shop specializing in designer ankle bracelets and designer label prison attire. Catering to all your socialite needs. There are also plans a foot for a horror theme park where you can dress up as a prisoner and stay in Paris's cell. The Horror part is Paris will be in the same cell talking incessantly about herself.
Go Directly to Jail:
The Go directly to Jail, don't pass go, don't collect $200 dollars will now be reworded to now state 'Go Directly to your 8 bedroom mansion, have another snort of go, give your dealer $200.'
Water Works:
The Water Works is back, with tears flowing at an ever increasing rate.
Get Out of Jail Free:
The Get out of Jail Free card is now rescindable depending on the mood of fellow players.
These cards will be offered and then when the prisoner thinks they are free they will be rescinded with an ensuring media frenzy.
Community Chest:
Community Chest is to be renamed the Paris Bra fund.
Railway Stations:
Instead of railways stations there will now be Hilton Hotels.
The New York Hilton
The Miami Hilton
The London Hilton
and
The Paris Hilton.
Due to some problems the Paris Hilton's upper floors seem to be vacant,
although its lobby area reports high turnstile activity.
Chance:
The Chance cards will now be called the 'Absolutely last chance cards'
You'll receive 7 of these then you will finally be sent to Jail.
Instead of winning $10 as a runner up in a beauty contest, you'll now get nothing as there are no prizes for second.
Electric Company:
The Electricity Company is back, but instead of showing a light globe its symbol will be am little more dim.
Poor Tax: (Luxury Tax)
The Poor Tax Square will now be called the Poor Little Ms Hilton Boo Who Tax, which isn't such a small sum, its a much larger sum now paid directly to L.A. County Sheriff's department.
Free Parking:
Somebody doesn't have her license anymore, the space formerly used for free parking will now be used to build an alternative therapies college for traumatized rich brats instead.
Right: Paris on the Way back to Jail
Properties:
The Poorer Neighborhoods
Some of the low cost rental properties are now going to be bulldozed and high rise Hotels and large mansions have be built instead.
Poor Paris:
Isn't it terrible, Paris is being treated like shes just, well common. Maybe she needs a present to brighten her day up?
I know just the thing! Some new boxers for her, how thoughtful!
Don't Forget to check out the New Paris Hilton game at Mr Bagel Games
[ Bagelblogger: This is Satire ]
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Yes you heard right some how, Ms Hilton has managed to check out on medical grounds. Whilst she is busy checking out, why don't you check out Bagels new game blog.
Its underdevelopment, but seems Paris couldn't wait!
Mr Bagel Games
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There's a series of 11 videos showing the Israeli Government documentary of the 6 Day War of 1967 which have been posted at Mr BagelVideo
On Monday June 5, 1967, 14 Arab countries came thundering down on Israel. Their armies far exceeded hers. Their Russian-backed weapons resources were vast. Yet in six dramatic days, the little country not only won a decisive victory, but also changed the map of the Middle East. This was the Six Day War.
To see the full list of these Eleven Videos
and their links click Read More
Text as per Youtube upload
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There's nothing like a good dose of hyperbole to get an article going. Leave your critical facilites at the door Ladies and Gentleman we have another South African sponsored rant to believe...
PRETORIA
Tue, 05 Jun 2007
No country in the world has been able to flout international law as much as Israel in the four decades since the Six Day War, the South African government said on Monday.
Speaking at a reception for all the Arab ambassadors posted to Pretoria, South Africa's deputy foreign minister Aziz Pahad said the international community had failed the Palestinian people by not putting an end to the occupation of their land which was captured by Israel in 1967.
"Israel has been able to defy the international community with impunity ... No country has been allowed to get away with such blatant violations of international law," he said on the eve of the 40th anniversary of the Six Day War when Israel took the West Bank, Gaza Strip and east Jerusalem.
[Click read more to see full article]
The 'facts' have not changed
"The situation 40 years on is still bad. Israeli settlements are continuing in Palestinians' territory. The facts on the ground have not changed.
"Israeli violence against Palestine is continuing. The Israeli authorities continue to arrest and imprison Palestinian ministers and legislators. The construction of the wall continues," he added in reference to the barrier being erected by Israel along the West Bank.
South Africa has been one of the most vocal supporters of the Palestinian cause, comparing their struggle against occupation with the fight against whites-only apartheid rule that ended in 1994.
In a statement, the governing African National Congress (ANC) also expressed their solidarity with the Palestinian people.
"Today, thirteen years after the end of apartheid, South Africans need to join hands and act in solidarity with the people of Palestine as they struggle for the realization of their basic human rights," it said.
"These include the right to self-determination and the return of the people of Palestine."
AFP
Bagelblogger...When one comes across drivel like this, the first temptation is to turn the page, click through to another more interesting 'news item', but thats where the problem lies.
I believe most people with a reasonable awareness of 20th century history and the undercurrents of world politics could spot the glaring inconsistencies in this article at 20 paces.
The unfortunate truth is, they're not the ones that need to be addressed. It's the less worldly more gullible audiences around the world which fall for this drivel, hook line and sinker that need to be provided with an easily digestible alternative option.
The Mantra they believe is, If it's written it must be true.
With the recent ANC support of the Palestinians becoming more and more overt, it would be easy to feel Israel is becoming more and more 'isolated'.
It's a master stroke of Arab stratagem that they have slowly of late began to rewrite the narrative.
Its not the narrative of the poorer areas of Cairo,these souls generally believe Nasser taught Israel a lesson back in 1967.
It's a far more sophisticated narrative that is slowly being rewritten for a far more astute and critical audience in the 21'st century.
Traditionally Israel has been held up in the pro Palestinian Pan Arabic world as the tormentors of the Palestinians, the fanatical oppressors of a poor under privileged and under empowered group of innocents.
A group of victims who have managed to develop a portfolio of victim hood that out maneuvers and blinds the world to far worst humanitarian tragedies.
The Palestinians have taken the art of playing Victim to a new level.
Initially the World was outraged, and allowed the Arab bloc to manipulate the UN assembly, and later the UNHRC and enable Sanction after Sanction to cloud the real horizon and the real truth.
Things are slowly changing. The Western world after 9-11 has become a little less patient of the 'Victim narrative which is interwoven with a terrorist themed duality'.
The so called 'Pigs and Apes' Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is so fond of driving into the sea isn't quite working, It's time for a new ad campaign.
With the huge expansion of media resources, and the empowerment of the individual through blogging, Israel is currently seeing the beginning of a new, more dangerous and omnipotent narrative.
Its a narrative which is dangerously seductive to the US State department, its a fix all, patch all promise of, well biblical proportions.
No longer is Israel seen just as the oppressor of the 'poor Palestinian', no the ante has been upped, the understated threat is understood.
The Arab bloc has recently and ferociously be writing the narrative of the 'If only'.
The premise is all the Islamic extremism, all the terror attacks, all the worlds suffering caused by terrorism is reducible to one magical equation.
and you might ask what is that equation?
Well If only Israel had been more peaceful, If only the Western world and been more 'consultative' towards the Arab world and the establishment of a state for the 'Jews'.
If only Israel would return to its borders of 1967....
The Western world is accused of trying to satisfy its own internal guilt by giving the Jews a homeland, the west had no right to promise.
It's really quite simple. If Israel hadn't been established against the desires of its Arabic neighbors then:
- There would be no Islamic Fundamentalism.
- There would be No Islamic Terrorism
- There would be No instability in the Middle East
- The quagmire called Iraq would be solved.
- Islamists would suddenly yell we love America rather than death to America
- Petrol would flow into our gas tanks at a ridiculously cheap price
Click.. Click...
and every one would be happy......
References:
News article:
iafrica.com: SA slams Israel's 40-year occupation
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Israeli Satire Laboratory
'A mad Israeli experiments with satire in the volatile Middle East'
The Israeli Satire Lab is a world gone mad. In this parallel universe stern justice is handed down without regard to past achievements, and even acclaimed, Nobel prize-winning, genocidal terrorists are dealt with as if they were ordinary, run of the mill murderers, rapists and thieves. Lying, corrupt politicians are treated with disdain, while honest, hard-working whores are applauded. Join us as we try to escape this absurd, upside down world, by laughing at it all. Updated twice a week or more.
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Haveil Havalim
Get Out of Jail Free:
Free Parking:
Poor Paris:
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